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Brenda Ann Spencer

Brenda Ann Spencer (a.k.a. The Garfield Killer) was an edgy 16-year-old lesbian ginger whose retarded alcoholic daddy made the brilliant decision to buy her a rifle for Christmas despite the fact that he had been molesting her for years. On Monday, January 29, 1979, finally fed up with years of abuse and high as fuck on a combination of PCP and alcohol, Brenda decided to take out her brand-spanking-new Ruger and end her miserable life in style. Being too much of a fucking pussy to just blow a hole in her daddy's head and feeling that it would be too heterosexual to stick the barrel of a gun in her mouth, Brenda instead decided that she would get the police to do the job for her.

Seeing as she lived directly across from Grover Cleveland Elementary School in San Diego, Brenda decided that the fastest way to get the cops to come and blow her brains out would be to snipe some squeakers from the comfort of her bedroom. Unfortunately, despite managing to kill both the school principal and custodian, Brenda had neglected to factor in the fact that the police in Commiefornia would be too fucking soft to shoot a 16-year-old white bitch even if she was shooting directly at children and cops. After being arrested and asked why she did it, Brenda responded with the unforgettable phrase "I don't like Mondays."

Despite utterly failing to kill herself and still being alive to this very day, Brenda Ann Spencer did help make America's National Pastime popular again following a nearly 15 year hiatus since Charles Whitman's Tumor and 50 years since Andrew Kehoe invented the sport by blowing up a fucking elementary school. Brenda is also notable for being the first woman to participate in school shooting under Title IX.

(( I DON'T LIKE MONDAYS ))


What have I missed?	Korryn Gaines 2 days ago	Waco 4 days ago	Bullet to the Head of the NRA 6 days ago

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Did You Know...

From Encyclopædia Dramatica's endless supply of factoids:

... that Zaiger Nuked the forums. Join us on EDF3 - No zaigers allowed
... that Zaiger tried to create his own ED, with no users, and shitty content
... that Twitter verified us! Follow EDdotSE.
... that there's also ED_NewPages and #EDAOTN?
... that a woman in Florida called nigger a nigger, humped his arm, and schlicked all while in his custody?
... that Linkin Park singer Chester Bennington has committed suicide at his private residence in L.A. by hanging himself?
... that a woman who used a plastic penis to dupe her dumb, blindfolded girlfriend into believing she was actually a man has been jailed?
... that a GOP Candidate told blacks to go back to Africa?
... that a man in California has been jailed for 16 years after admitting he stole and tortured cats, killing 18 of them?
... that CNN have gone zerg butthurt over a kid who made a GIF retweeted by Donald Trump showing CNN getting beaten which made them dox and blackmail the kid?
... that ANTIFA is now now protesting for Sharia Law?
... that while people could be working toward curing cancer they instead turned their efforts toward building fridges that grow pot?
... dat dem dere gub'ment done took Alex Jones' baby away and his defense is that he only does it for the lulz?
... that the south's trashcan manages to embarrass itself yet again when somehow a guy pretending to be a cop pulls over an actual cop?
... that everyone these days is such an attention whore that they can't even pop a cap in someone's ass without posting the whole thing on Facebook?
... that bombing Arabs still somehow surprises tons of people each and every single time it happens?
... that some guy you've never heard of is stepping down from something or other that you never really cared about in the first place?

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★ WOMEN'S HISTORY MONTH 2018 ★
E.D. SALUTES SENATOR REBECCA FELTON

THE LAST SLAVE OWNER TO HOLD OFFICE

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	“	Lewinsky brilliantly challenges her own previous narrative. Four years ago, she still wrote of her relationship with Clinton as consensual...	„
	—Guess who's suddenly changed their middle name to "#MeToo"?